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How Not To Get Sponsored

Nice Grind!

I don’t want to crush your dreams, but chances are you’re not good enough to get sponsored. Don’t worry though, skateboarding is still fun if you’re not getting paid or getting free stuff. If you don’t agree, then why the hell are you riding? If you still really want to try to get hooked up here are some things that are sure to fail. Kids try these things everyday and all they are is a waste of time.

Send A Sponsor Me Email
Companies love it when you send them emails asking to be sponsored. Hell, why should you even spell sponsored properly at all? Here are the cool ways to write it: sponcered, sponcerd, and sponscerd. Be sure to include a list of tricks you can do like “ollie, kickflip, sometimes heelflips, land a 360 flip with one foot”. Don’t forget that you don’t have to only send emails to companies to get sponsored. I get emails all the time from kids asking me to sponsor them. Just because we don’t have a team or anything to give to them doesn’t mean they can’t ride for us!

Sponsor Me Pictures
You’ve probably already heard back from companies about your sponsor me email and the million dollar contracts are in the mail, but incase that hasn’t happened yet you can always sweeten your reputation with some sponsor me pictures. Call up your friend, if you have one, go buy a disposable camera from the grocery store, and then go find some impressive looking spots. Everyone is doing handrails these days, so you should too. Don’t worry about actually being able to do a trick on the handrail though. Just set your board on top of it and carefully step on. As soon as your second foot is on the deck get your friend to snap a pic. Be sure to hold your arms out to make it look like you are balancing, smile, and possibly even look at the camera. Now you have a nice new 17 stair handrail picture. Might as well say it was switch too, because your potential sponsor doesn’t know you actually ride goofy.

Ask A Pro
Did I say ask? I could go back and change it now, but I’m a forward thinking kind of guy. What I really meant was demand a pro. Of course you don’t know any pros now, and will never be liked by any pros, but that’s what demos are for. Find out about any upcoming demos and get your ass to them. It doesn’t matter if it’s not for the company you want to ride for. You’re going to have a ton of sponsors in your life and this one is just something to start with. Don’t wait for the product toss or autograph signings to get in there and get your sponsorship because that’s what all of the other kids are doing. Besides, you need to show these pros that you are a serious person. March right out onto the demo area while everyone is skating, go up to one of the newer rides on the team that surely has no actual ties to the company as far as owning a part of it, and tell him what’s what. You might want to bring a print off of your sponsor me email with you so you can read it to him. Don’t bring your skateboard with you though because pros are insecure and if you do a 360 flip and only land it with one foot right in front of them, they probably aren’t going to sponsor you. They’ll feel threatened that you’re going to take their spot on the team with your awesome skills. Just stick to telling them that they have to sponsor you or else. Or else what? Be creative and give them a good reason. Try making references to family members and friends for added effect.

The Infamous Sponsor Me Tape
While I’ve received plenty of sponsor me emails since starting Heyday, I’ve never gotten any sponsor me tapes. I’m guessing that noone bothers to send sponsor me tapes because actual proof that you can do the tricks you claim is useless. Who doesn’t trust an email? If you’re too lazy to just send an email though and want to take the easy way out by filming a video part, here are some tips. Editing can be your best friend when making a sponsor me tape, but also your worst enemy. Do not, I repeat, do not cut out the tricks that you don’t land! This will make your video seem unrealistic. Haven’t you noticed the trend of reality shows ever since Survivor came out however many years ago? You need to make this video represent how you really skate. Now, if you’re not going to cut out any unlanded tricks you might be wondering what the point of editing is. The answer is simple. Special effects, slow motion, and music. Nothing boosts the production value of your video quite like adding transistions and wipes between every clip. Don’t stick to just a few types either, because that will get boring. Use every transition and wipe your editing program offers. Slow motion is very important for adding emphasis to tricks that you are going to repeat a lot. You want to have lots of ollies and 180s in the mix, but you don’t want them to get boring. Adding slow motion to them will give them a really cool look and drags them out so you can appreciate them more. Next you need to add music to the video because it will make your skateboarding look better. There are two roads you can travel down while choosing music for your part. You can either go with obvious choice of Blink 182 or Simple Plan, or you can use the song from your favorite pro’s video part. That’s pretty much it. Just put your video on a cd, tape, or dvd, leave it unlabelled, and mail it to the company you want to get sponsored by. Make sure to send the master because making a copy lowers the video quality so much that a company will automatically reject it. Just ask them to send it back when they are done watching it. They won’t mind paying the shipping.

After having tried all of these things, if you’re still not sponsored, chances are the world of skateboarding just isn’t ready for the awesomeness that is you. Maybe work on your barrel jumping and you’ll find yourself a spot in the 2012 Summer Olympics. Until then, stop worrying about it and just have fun.

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15 Responses to “How Not To Get Sponsored”

  1. Anthony Says:

    i want be sponsored by u a can do a ollie, kick flip,and a 50-50 grind. i know u think that sucks but im only 10 years old,so chill. i want to work my way up to be the next ryan sheckler!!!

    i promise if i ever become pro(which i will) i will mention u!!!

    plz sponsor me!!!

  2. cameron Says:

    Hi Anthony,
    We don’t sponsor people. The whole idea behind the article is to make fun of people who go about getting sponsored in half-assed ways. Sorry you misunderstood the gag.

  3. Connor Says:

    hahahaha he thought hed get sponsored with those tricks hahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahaah!!!!

  4. Liv Says:

    Aw poor kid.

    Nice article though. Made me laugh.

  5. easter bunny Says:

    HEY LITTLE KID IM COMING FOR UR SOUL!!!!!

  6. Zach Says:

    Don’t worry little kid. The Easter Bunny isn’t real! Besides that’s one’s a homo anyway.

  7. cameron Says:

    i’m sponsord and cameron you need to get a little better and ryan sheckler is a fag!!

  8. johny john Says:

    my friends sponser me tape :]

  9. yo mamma Says:

    leave the little kid alone before i pop a cap up all ur asses little punks i could probably kill all u in skatin switch tre-flip

  10. -DecaDe- Says:

    hey yo mamma do you relize your threating people over the internet so for all i know your fat as helll cant even walk or you could be the next dr. phil or mabye you could be so person we will never hear of again but you are right leave the kid alone all though im thinking that the kid wasnt like 10 and was joking but whatevere

  11. chyo Says:

    I can see Jo landing it with one foot.
    “WHAT NOW!?!”

  12. Z BONE Says:

    ive already got skate videos showing me ill never be good enough to be pro, am, or flow for any team, or at least one thats worth it, now ive got this site.. thank you heyday skateboarding ur my best freind.

  13. PiMpIn SkAtEr Says:

    all of u are homos lol

  14. PiMpIn SkAtEr Says:

    i got some very sweet moves, i can get sonsored any time, any day, jk lol

  15. Raddest MF alive Says:

    when did punctuation go extinct? The “.”’s and “,”’s are next to the “M”….use them